Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Scene From The Lush Counter

I stopped by the Lush counter on my way home from work Monday. Nestled in a corner of Macy's, it's a little oasis of smelly things tended by perky, perky salesgirls. I suspect the cocobutter fumes make them high.

So, I was waiting in line behind a tall, blonde woman with a long black coat. She had a little heart-shaped pin on her lapel and appeared to be in her late forties. Pretty unassuming. She was purchasing some massage oil bars. When I stepped behind her, she turned to me and initiated the following exchange:

Blonde: Oh, what are you getting?
Me: Um, some shampoo?
Blonde: Oh, don't you just love girly things?
Me: Totally.
Blonde: I had some airline stewardesses from American Continental stalking me, and they couldn't understand why I spent money on girly things. They called me a city girl! I think they were jealous. You know?
Me: You had airline stewardesses stalking you?
Blonde: I didn't want to tell you this, but I was raped. By eight airline pilots.
Me: . . .
Blonde: It was terrible. They took turns. And I just think those stewardesses were jealous! They were following me around and taunting me and making fun of me! Because I had nice things and cosmetics! Just don't turn to me and be angry at ME because you chose to be a stewardess and I chose the life of a city girl! Isn't it great being a city girl?
Me: Oh, yeah, totally.
Blonde: So, I probably shouldn't tell you this, but one of the stewardesses, she had both male and female parts. She wanted to live as a woman, but she hated women. That's why the whole thing started.
Me: Um, that's really too bad.
Blonde: I'll never fly American Continental again.
Me: . . .
Blonde (finishing her transaction and walking off): Enjoy your shampoo!

Okay.

That has really stuck with me -- I mean, American Continental? Those are two different airlines, completely.

She must have been crazy, is all I can imagine.

17 comments:

Operative C said...

Crazy, yet well-dressed and shopping at Lush... Who says you can't get by on looks alone?

It's the crazy part that'll get you gang-banged by airline pilots and stalked by transexual stewardesses.

CW said...

best read today. by far.

Anonymous said...

i bet you anything she was high.

such an awesome story.

Anonymous said...

I believe it. In fact, the more bizarre the more believeable. People are gang raped all the time. In fact, many murderers are high level executives. This story is just not so crazy compared to the things we see in the news everyday, (e.g., children being murdered by their parents, abductions, rapes, etc.) In the end it is always the rich who seem to get away with the crimes especially if they are mob related. Maybe she wasn't that crazy after all. I mean if she was shopping at Lush, well-dressed with long blonde hair she might just be one of those rich chicks who live in the high-end of town, possibly a reputable executive. Lifetime television for woman has so many stories like this, I personally believe it. Who knows it could happen to anyone of us. Have you ever heard of gang stalking? Look it up. It is absolutely unreal what these people do! Wow! My heartfelt sympathies to anyone who has problems like this. I hope that this story is untrue, but if it is not I wish the victim the best.

Anonymous said...

Wow. Why did you continue a conversation with her if your were offended? I would have exchanged niceties and walked away if I wasn't intrigued by the story. I am wondering...does being gang-banged by pilots turn you on? I agree American and Continental are two different lines, but come on do you think that pilots only hang around with pilots from their own airline. I am starting to think you might be the blonde.

Anonymous said...

This story seems totally insensitive. Some people will do anything to make themselves look good. Shame on you for being such a snit! You act like you are totally uninterested when you tell the story, yet you let her continue to talk to you until she leaves? Strange. It seems you must have had more conversation. I mean I just have a hard time understanding why she would have gone so in-depth if you did not respond to her completely. Something is shady.

Anonymous said...

You think the cocobutter makes the sales girls high? You must be one jealous odd looking chicks. Nothing you have posted is worth any value. I have been in Lush and the sales people there are wonderful and definitely trendy. Just because they are cute and skinny that is no reason to make ill reference to their behavior. As for the blonde, who knows, it may be true. If it is, hope it never happens to you, or are you jealous that it was her and not you who was raped. Come on sweetie, I am sure you are far from perfect.

Anonymous said...

Is the hermorphidite's name Julie?

Anonymous said...

Sweetie, get a life! You must be one of those odd women who cut down other women for fun. Misery just loves company. Wow, your story was so impressive, you are so important. Loser. What won't you do to get attention. Your answers to the Blonde are extremely lame. I think there is more to this conversation than meets the eye. You answered, "Um". You made yourself sound a little too perfect. Are you trying to make yourself look good in front of America. I don't think you are telling the entire truth. Nice try, I am not buying your end of the story. Lame.

Operative C said...

Woah, anonymous... you caw-raaaazy!

Anonymous said...

Hi, I just wanted to chime in here and say that you shouldn't brush off what the blonde woman said. I think that sometimes in life terribel ansd upsetting things happen to people, especially domestic violence and abuse, and that you shouldn't judge people until you've walked in their shoes. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Operative - do you know how to spell "crazy". Are you educated or are you trash. It seems you are trash by your dialogue. Oh, by the way, shemale was not a transexual, shemale is a hermorphite. I hope someone gives you a dictionary and English classes for Christmas. Also, the girls at Lush certainly did not appreciate the blog hosts comments and wanted me to tell her that they are all advanced degrees and have professional lives outside of these jobs. Cocoabutter what?

Hipster Pit said...

Hey, Anon:

It's "hermaphrodite," and the period goes inside the quotes.

Also, you SO caw-raaaazy!

Operative C said...

Shit. Looks like I've been outed for being both uneducated and trashy, which apparently are traits that necessarily walk hand in hand. I will consider that a double-burn and concede any arguments to my anonymous, epistolary combatant, and now, thus proved, intellectual superior. I bow down to you, mighty one, and will now get back to spitting on people that I know not to have attended college, as they are but trash, and worthy of scorn...

Anonymous said...

The quotes only go outside the sentence when it is part of the sentence. Individual words are often quoted within the text and inside the period.

Operative, no one called you uneducated--you confessed that yourself. By the way, I did not write the anonymous comment before mine--that belongs to someone else.

I think you are missing the point and obviously, I am missing yours. I realize that you are having a good time on this site, but I was just trying to point out the issues about domestic violence. Sorry you think that is crazy. I actually went to Lush last week to pick up some soap and that blonde woman you are talking about was in the store, so I asked her a few questions. She did say that she had a conversation with you and she remembers you. I gave her the blog information just in case she wants to get a hold of you. For your information, many letters have been written to those particular airlines (yes, she does know the difference between Continental and American) and the police have been notified and so have the hospitals. In fact, I believe there is a lawsuit in the making. Sometimes things like this happen. Just because people are executives (in this case, pilots and morphy stews), does not make them good people. Shit does happen. Many wealthy people have committed crimes such as rape and murder.

Oh, well, enjoy. By the way, Happy Holidays. I am glad I ran into that woman at the State Street store, she was very nice and I personally believe her. She was smart, polite, and well-educated and has a good position in a law office. She had no reason to lie about something like this. She is not bitter or angry, she is only worried about other women going through the same problem and hopes that one day that rape and all other crimes will cease.

Hipster Pit said...

in Plano?

Anonymous said...

Did you ever hear of the airlines? Sometimes people from Plano, Texas, visit Chicago. I have family in Chicago, so I visit. The blonde has brown eyes, straight shoulder length hair, bangs, in her early 40s, with a red heart pin on her left lapel with gold around the heart, a long black coat that ends below the knees, boots, etc. She goes to Macy's little Lush corner frequently because she likes purchasing their items. She lives on Ontario and Michigan. I had a nice chat with her, she was very pleasant and concerned for other women. She only told you the story because you looked like someone who is very informed and in tune to what is going on in the world and she is concerned for other women. She walked into this situation blind and she has paid dearly for it. She has many friends and family that have given her great support in this difficult time period. She is a survivor, a fighter and eternally compassionate for other people.